Gaijin Bars

Gaijin = foreigner. Gaijin bar = place where foreigners hang out. They are usually pretty easy to spot. Bunch of international flags in the window. Some sort of non-Japanese beer advertisements like Budweiser or Guinness to attract a passing gaijin's attention. Let's not forget the ubiquitous, shitty wall of signed foreign currency. Bunch of American and Canadian bills stapled to the wall with great quotes like "JEFF WAS HERE! Bumville, Texas 1998".

While I'm a fan of the authentic Japanese experience and all that jive, I'm also a fan of cute Australian girls. I'm also a fan of Japanese girls who go to gaijin bars to meet mysterious hairy foreigners like myself. So I've been to my share of of these bars.

Last night JAM, Dave, and I headed out to a gaijin bar in Nagano called Liberty. America f**k yeah! Pretty cool spot, played some darts, met some local ex-patriots from the UK, Dave ate some tasty spaghetti. Now I'm not quite sure where the night went all wrong for me. Could have been the copious amounts of beer, but I spent the last 2 weeks on tour with a band, so my tolerance for beer is godly at this point. Might have been my desision not to eat my dinner due to excessive onion action. Maybe when I started buying girls drinks on our BBC America expense account, which resulted in someone giving us all gin and tonics. However, I'm fairly certain the problem arouse when JAM spotted a bottle of Kahula on the bar. JAM being totally gay for The Big Lebowski, suggested we all start drinking white russians...

Empty stomach + lots of beer + gin and tonics + multiple thick and creamy white russians = stinky hotel room. I awoke this morning to find a disaster area inside my bathroom. I have no recollection of leaving the bar, the taxi ride back, entering the hotel room, the un godly horror that occurred inside my bathroom or getting into bed. Lucky for me, my best friends EVER documented the whole process with a digi camera! I'm sure JAM will post them in a few.

Edited by JAM:

First off let me ease the minds out there and clear up some confusion by those that were obviously hammered last night. Dave is the one who spotted the bottle of Kahula, and if my memory serves me correctly (which it is always on) it was Scott who suggested we start drinking the Caucasians. I give Scott a little credit on the distorted history, at that point of the evening he was probably 10 or so beers deep. So I can understand the foggy recollection.

He was right on one point though, Dave and I being the upright citizens that we are did happen to document the high points for the evening as shown by the photos below. Feel free to browse through and see just how an ending of destruction is started. And for the kids reading out there, expelling your stomach content the way it came in is never good, so don't ever drink. Unless the drinks are Caucasians, in which case enjoy and don't pull a Scott…

The Night of No Reservations

I've been a little behind on the "blogosphere" - damn what a lame term - but here I am with all new material for all 4 of you reading this. (5 if you count Wookie) Our adventure so far has been grand, spectacular, amazing and stupendous. All words that Jam will need me to explain to him later. Get the coloring pencils Jam and I'll draw really big pictures and you can color them in after, Scott can hold the paper down for you!

The main reason I've fallen behind on this is solely due to the fact that, well, I'm lazy and I don't really have all that many people reading this, and the ones who are, I've already updated them on most things. So, why am I writing now? Well, I think last nights experience was truly one of a kind. Here's how it all went down.

After arriving in Fukuoka we headed toward the Toyoko-Inn, the hotel chain that has been very kind to us these past few weeks. To my surprise they were completely booked. Jam and I were both shocked, since we've been easily able to stroll right into any Toyoko-Inn and find rooms. Scott of course, in his charming way replies, "I knew this would happen". Thanks Scott. I think he mumbled something else like, "This wouldn't happen with MY hotel if you IDIOTS would just follow me like the sheep that you are". Or maybe that was just my imagination.

So onward we journeyed into the unknown. Following our self proclaimed, "Team Leader" as we taxied to another hotel. Jam and I could see it all in slow-motion, Scott strutting up to the counter, politely asking in broken Japanese "3 rooms please?". Then we saw the sky crash down and the world began to slowly stop spinning..."Fully Booked". Duh Duh Duh. Oh no, not that, anything but THAT! Panic began to set in. "How could this happen?", Scott asked himself, "I'm NEVER wrong!". Scott fingered through his "Japan Bible" - which by the way is hitting 1 for 10, $25 well spent - Jam was frantically making phone calls to hotels found on the back of a local map. All 15 hotels were booked solid, no joke. I did a lap around the block for local hotels but with no luck.

We admitted defeat at that point and decided that we might have better luck in a different city seeing that Fukuoka was obviously not being kind to weary travelers. On the way to the train station we came upon a Mister Donuts shop, were they have all sorts of magical morsels to fill your empty tummy. And ours were empty. So we decided to take a detour and fill the gas tank. So while Jam and I are eating our tasty treats, Scott being outside of course plotting his next "I told you so" line, Jam and I decided that the situation was FUBAR, and there was no point in crying over spilled milk. Instead we decided to have some fun. We decided to continue on toward Osaka which was about 2hrs away, but get completely hammered on the way! I'm talking shit-faced with no coming back. Thats how we were gonna roll with it, American style. So we told Scott about it and he agreed, its better to just drown the concerns with suds, or in Jams case, Sake. We loaded up on booze and hopped onto the train headed toward Osaka.

The train ride was great, Jam and I watched "Robot Jox", one of the WORST 80's sci-fi movies ever made. We all drank every last drop of booze that boarded the train with us and shortly later arrived in Osaka! Ready to find a hotel to lay our drunken heads. Toyoko-Inn seemed like a safe bet, close to the train, easy to walk to, plus we could see it from the station, which makes us feel secure. So we headed off in that direction, noticing a 24hr Internet gaming cafe on the way. We arrived at the hotel, eyes wide, ready for our nice soft bed and shower to go with. Jam walks in, 10 seconds later walks right back out and says the dreaded words that had been haunting us all night, "Fully Booked". The reason, Baseball. There's apparently lots of baseball going on in Osaka this time of year. DAMN!

Battered and beaten, disheveled and disarrayed we moved on. We were a bit tipsy at this point and not looking forward to striking out in search of another Fully Booked hotel. So we did what any other drunks in Japan would do, KARAOKE! This was great! Right across the street was a bar that was cheap, had rooms to rest in and beer to drink. We payed a small fee and went for it. I'll spare you the dirty details but imagine Karaoke, then us, drunk....Yup, thats how it was. Enough of that. We got booted out around 3am, I think, and remembered the 24hr Internet gaming cafe right down the street. Hmmm....maybe we could crash there for the night, get up when the trains start moving and just sleep on the trains for hours! BRILLIANT! And that's exactly what we did. We made the system work in our favor. Got comfy cubicles smaller that most bathrooms, but it was a place to kick our feet up and get some much needed shuteye.

Lessons learned:

Don't ever make hotel reservations since its way more fun improvising.



Edited by JAM:

Dave put it perfectly there. Nothing else I can add but pictures. You can see through the progression of the pictures the frustration turning into motivation to drink. Then at the Karaoke club and finally our ending destination of the 24 hour internet café. I’ll just let the pictures speak for themselves.

Sakurajima volcano

Today was a great day. We started somewhat early and headed down to the JR train on our way to Sakurajima. This happens to be an active volcano that you can only reach by ferry located just off of the Kagoshima coast. As we approached the ferry terminal, the view was astounding. This volcano is still active and from the shore you could still see small plumes of smoke rising from one of the three peaks. The trip over was great, nice calm and relaxing; no way we could see what lay on the table ahead of us. (see below)






We start the venture to the island like any other tourist, wide-eyed and mouth in awe over the lagoon and beautiful coast line. (see below)


It started when we tried to negotiate the map sitting next to the train station. Followed closely by us trying to use our horrible language skills to ask a cab driver to take us to an observation deck. We arrived at a lookout that was great, showed us a view of where we docked and not to mention where we wanted to go. (see below)


We decided to take this opportunity of adventure by slowly making our way up the winding road to what could only be described as a , well I can’t really describe it actually. It looked as if parts of the volcano had just slide down the side during a giant eruption. This as we read did happen back in the 50’s. (see below)




Dave and I decided to venture up the rockslide to see how far up we could go. It was a long and daunting task that ended only because, well because Dave and I are fat and out of shape that’s why. (see below)







Even though we did stop a bit short, we got some amazing photos. All in all a great trip up the volcano. On the walk (that’s right walk back down, which I might add, put our fat asses back in shape after 8 Kilometers) back down we saw a small box on the side of the road. In that box were pairs of oranges picked from the local volcanic orchards. Next to the box was a smaller one that said something we couldn’t read, but what we could make out was 1 bag for 100 yen. So we tempted fate and purchased some oranges. These were probably the worst oranges or any fruit for that matter that we have ever tasted. Horrible before, during and after taste not to mention the feeling of burning and ripping that you felt soon after ingestion. The day ended with us climbing off of the trolley back to the hotel. I (Jam) was paying for both Dave and Scott with a 500 yen piece for a toll that was 480 yen. We were in a rush to get out of the way so I just tossed the coin in and thought nothing of it. To all of our surprise we find the trolley operator chasing after us with my change. Just goes to show how great the Japanese people are. Very thoughtful, very considerate and extremely polite. Like I said, all in all a great day.


As a simple ending to the night, Scott and I took off to find a bar that we noticed in his touristy book. The bar wasn’t half bad, this one actually had sports on T.V. Granted it was Soccer, but it was a sport. Best part was probably the darts. Now I don’t claim to be a great dart player, but I can hold my own. Tonight it seems that not only does luck but booze make Scott a better darts thrower and the game ended with his win over me with a total of 245-32. Not my best outing, but next time the game will be mine. You can see below Scott’s face of victory, and my face of utter defeat.

Day of a Million Trains

After a day of doing nothing but train hopping, we have reached our final destination for the night named Kagoshima. Tomorrow we will be heading to a volcano via ferry. Pictures and blog will be much better, but as you can see from the pictures, we are all very tired and need sleep. Enjoy.








EDITED BY SCOTT:

Finally got around to uploading some still images. Being hired to shoot video, usually means I don't get to snap many photos. Here's a few:

Drunken salary men kicking each other in Ikebukuro.


JAM, insecure in his masculinity is upset by water shooting up his bum. Once you you use a Japanese toilet... you'll have to take a shower back home just to feel so fresh again.

Not sure why JAM always posts pics of our ugly mugs when we are seeing scenery like this everyday. Nagasaki, the San Francisco of Japan at sunset.

Kumamoto Castle

Well I am going to keep this one short.

Scott was sick so Dave and I decided to hit the Kumamoto Castle without him. Probably for the best anyway seeing in how I’m sure it’s not polite in any culture to spread disease. Castle was very fascinating, and it is hard to believe that it was build some 500 years ago. Brilliant. Well I’m out for now, enjoy the pictures.

Tour re-cap: Zepp Osaka 3/15 & Zepp Nagoya 3/16

The Zepp series of shows featured Insolence opening for the band 10-FEET. If I had to describe 10-FEET in lamens terms... they are the Japanese Green Day. Kinda pop punk, and just as popular. Those shows sold out in minutes and were between 3000 and 2500 capacity venues. Not only are they a hugely successful band... but super fun to hang out with. Takuma-san, lead vox/guitar was so cool with everyone in our group, including me, and I'm just some no-body camera man. He even came out to Insolence's last show in Fukuoka to guest DJ and perform a few songs of stage with them.

The highlight of the Osaka show was Dave and I convincing Jam to crowd surf. Being a forienger, Jam was able to part the crowd like Moses and the Red Sea and made it to the center with shocking ease. The locals always assume we are working, and try their best to get out of our way. I've seen entire mosh pits break because I got to close with my camera. He signaled for a few members in the crowd to hoist him up, just as the song broke down to a slower beat. Not quite the right mood for surfing a a group of sweaty kids. 10-FEET doesn't keep it light for too long and as soon as the tempo picked up Jam was on his way to the front of venue. It was pretty awesome. 99% of the time I hate James, but he seemed pretty cool at that moment.

After the Nagoya show and our last after party with 10-FEET, Masa (10-FEET's manager) presented me with a CD signed by all the members and a special note to: "Super Camera Man". Score.

Go buy 10-FEET's albulm, they deserve your money. Those guys are cool as shit.

Tour re-cap: Heaven's Rock. Saitama 3/13

So we all trained out to Saitama, which is a suburb of the massive Tokyo metropolitian area. There we met up with Maximum the Hormone. These guys are huge in Japan, and have a quite a following in the international otaku population for their work on the Deathnote soundtrack.

Ichy, Insolence's DJ and fellow otaku was quick to have the entire band sign his Deathnote inspired note book. I really really wish I had thought of that.

Daisuke (vox) and Nowa (drum/vox) were really chill, and we spent quite some time backstage just chatting. They were so reserved (no drinking) backstage and it was amazing to see them transform during their set opening for Insolence. Even the members of Insolence were kinda shocked that Maximum the Hormone wasn't head lining the show. Nowa on drums was super impressive and the show was awseome to see. The smaller venue was packed beyond capacity and turned into sauna once bands starting playing. The heat and sweat in the air immdiatley caused my camera lense to fog, so it was quite the battle to document. Between bands, I went backstage and used a hair dryer to heat my lense to something closer to the room's temperature, and thus reduce the fogging. Yeah, it was that hot in there.

The show was great, despite being drenched in sweat and I got a huge nerd buzz when they played the Deathnote OP and END.

Tour re-cap: Club Asia. Shibuya, Tokyo. 3/12

Wow... my last bloggins was from Tokyo. The tour is now over, so I guess I'll do a quick re-cap of what I can remember.

This night had to be filled with the most unproffesional shenanigans I have ever seen. And I loved every minute of it! The first mistake was having 8 hours of downtime in between soundcheck and performance. That's a lot of time to drink. The 2nd mistake was putting Insolence, a pretty rowdy group of guys on the same bill with Osaka based Uzumaki...

Those guys are hardcore, and are deffiantely my new favorite Japanese band.
The ammount of whiskey that was consumed was impressive. The venues beer was rather expensive, so we raided the local conviinece store of ALL, and I do mean all of its whiskey. Mark, one of the lead singers for Insolence had nearly broken his ankel the night before, so he was popping vicadine like Mentos and was completely smashed. After 8 hours of whiskey not one member of band was even remotely sober. As crew, I also have access to powder room's booze, where the members of Uzumaki coined me a new nickname: "Whiskey Monster". After being given a sweet alias like that, it was hard not to get pass an Uzumaki member without paying the toll, which was usually and over sized shot. By the time Insolence went on stage, it was shear chaos. Mikey, the gutarist punched a wall and fractured his hand first song into the show. Half the band was unable to remember the set list. Intoxicated members from Uzumaki were running on stage an knocking over mics. I was so hammered I kept forgetting to press the record button on my camera. Some other highlights for the night include the gutarist from Uzumaki puking and pissing himself backstage, and Dutch (Uzumaki drummer) wrestling with some firefighters and nearly getting arrested.

That show was so punk-rock. Good times!

Biohazard Enberg

Well hello everyone out there. Unfortunately this post is going to be a short one, we haven’t been out much today with the weather being somewhat rainy and gloomy. It seems too that Scott has been attacked in the worst way and there is nothing we can do about it. Scott has some kind of illness that prevents him from living so Dave and I have left him in his room to fight the tiny but determined adversary. As you can see by the pictures, Scott is a Bio-mess and Dave is trying to fight it off. If we lose Scott the trip may come to an early end because neither Dave nor I can order any food on our own and living off of 7-11 would probably kill us in a short time.

The night of many meals

So last night we arrived in Kumamoto to the house of Ichi, the DJ for Insolence. We were welcomed with open arms and we immediately felt at home. His cousins took us on an hour long car ride to the top of a mountain and we arrived at a restaurant like I have never been to before. We all sat around a fire pit with a little bbq rack on it and we grilled up some chicken and vegetables. Oh man it was good. Oh yes, there was also a dog outside that seemed to want nothing more than to eat cloths. The sign was translated to us and said, “This dog is lonely and will probably bit your cloths but not you.” Which he held up to many times as all we wanted to do was pet him.

We returned to Ichi’s place only to jump back in the car and head to another downtown spot. More food, and more drinks. This time the food was a bit more exotic. And for those of you that are PETA members or animal lovers you may not be happy to hear that I have, as of last night, eaten horse. Taste a bit like salami, wasn’t bad. From there we hit another bar where we located a foosball table upstairs and what happened, you oh you guessed it, I owned everyone. Can’t help it, I’m like a god on foosball and Dave had to feel my wrath. He suggests that it was because I’m so so, but oh is he wrong. Anyway, today will probably be spent trying to find a laundry mat seeing in how we probably have a funk to us. Adios for now, I’ll try to get more on later